WHAT DOES “SOUL” MEAN TO YOU?

When you hear the word “soul,” what is the first thing you think of?  Some of the things that flooded my mind were:  Soul Train, Soul Power, the Beatles’ Rubber Soul album (really dating myself), all the Chicken Soup for the Soul books, Oprah’s Super Soul Sunday, soulmate, and the quote “The eyes are the windows to the soul.”

When you google “soul,”  you get the Disney and Pixar film Soul that debuted a year ago.  I had never heard of the movie, but my fourth graders, whom I was teaching, told me all about  it.  As a result, I am now a Disney Plus member, and watched the film –  which I adored.   The movie is about a middle-school band teacher named Joe whose life hasn’t quite gone the way he expected.  His true passion is jazz — and he’s good. But when he travels to another realm to help someone find their passion, he soon discovers what it means to have soul.  So…I ask you to join me here on this little quest to determine what it means to you.

I mentioned my fourth graders and they caused me to flashback to when I was ten.  I recalled what I believed “soul” to mean to me back then.  The best way I can explain it, is to first share this story called Fences by an unknown author.

“There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.

Finally the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.

The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, “You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won’t matter how many times you say I’m sorry, the wound is still there.”

I was taught growing up that your soul was like the fence.  Every bad or wrong thing you ever did left a scar on your soul.  In order to get to “heaven” you had “burn” all those scars off your soul in purgatory.  I now believe we are here in earth school to learn and grow and that we create our own “purgatories” right here on earth.  But the essence of the soul is unblemished unconditional love.

What then, is unconditional love?  Everyone will have their own version, so I will a share my most recent scenario and you can share yours below.   A few days ago my partner and I discovered what we thought was a parakeet in our yard.  I am not a bird person.  I am embarrassed to admit that I was afraid of birds, but I was certain this beautiful bird was someone’s pet and became determined to find its rightful owner.

For four days we automatically unconditionally tended to what we found out was a cockatiel.   I suddenly noticed all the other birds singing in the yard.   Had they always been there?  Of course!  But I had been to stressed to notice.  I observed how trusting they are, how effortlessly they fly, how unique they are, and how stunning.  The experiences I had with my new feathered friend that I had been fearful of, touched my soul.  In a sense he was a messenger, a soulmate.

I love Elizabeth Gilbert’s definition of soulmate in her New York Times Bestseller, Eat, Pray, Love.  This is what Ms. Gilbert says about soulmates: “People think that a soulmate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants.  But a true soulmate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that’s holding you back, the person that brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.  A true soulmate is probably the most important person you will ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake.  But to live with a soulmate forever?  Nah.  Too painful.  Soulmates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then they leave.

I believe that little bird came into my life as a catalyst for change: to teach and remind me about unconditional love, to get me out of my head, to follow my heart, and to awaken my soul.  And then he left, but I am pleased to report that he landed in a happy home, is loved, and is being well taken care of.

Isn’t that what most of us want?  The precious little bird prompted me to recall William Shakespeare’s quote, “The eyes are the windows to the Soul.”  When I look out the window now, I am seeing with my soul eyes.  Marianne Williamson says that when we are in love we see each other’s souls.  To me, the soul is unconditional love.  Let’s see!